Paper

Today Dad had a fascination with paper. First he talked about how paper was made.

“They make paper out of wood pulp. That is what they do.”

“I don’t know the process for how they make the paper. That is what I do not know.”

“When the paper comes out it is *LARGE* rolls. That is what it is.”
(Every time Dad said large, he shouted and just about scared me out of my skin. He repeated this about the large rolls over and over for nearly an hour.)

“That is how they make paper in America. That is what they do. It is also how they make paper in China and Russia. That is true of them.”

After more than an hour of this, shouting “LARGE” every few minutes, Dad changed to newspapers and newspaper delivery.

“The boys throw the paper. That is true of them.”

“They know how to throw the paper on the porch. That is what the boys do.”

“Sometimes they throw it on the roof. Then they have to get a ladder and get it down. That is what they do.”

“New houses in America do not have porches now. That is true of them. So the boys throw the paper *HARD* and hit the front door. That is what the boys do.”

“Everyone in America lives in their own house. That is what they do. Because there are so many houses, the yards are small. That is true of them. The small yards make it easier to look for your paper. That is what they do. You know where to look for your paper because your yard is so small. That is true of it.”

“The paper boy has grown up. That is true of him. The paper boy is now a man. That is what he is.”

(I’m not sure who he was referring to here. My brother threw the paper for a while as a teenager.)